The OC vs CC

Orange County vs Coffee County... just how different are they?

So I'm in the hot tub today... my one vice at the apartment complex we're living in... it has totally convinced me that we WILL be getting a hot tub once we move back home to the CC (Coffee County). So there I am, soaking in the sun, the hot water, and the cool breeze blowing in off the ocean 9 miles away, relaxing and enjoying the peace and quiet.

And then SHE arrived.

I don't know her, haven't seen her before in my life (that I'm aware of), but she must be a resident of the apartment complex as she had a key to get into the hot tub/spa area. She had on her two piece (yeah, right, 1 and a half piece) bathing suit. Everything falling out of what little she had on, talking on her cell phone. In the 20 minutes we shared the same spa area, I learned so much more about someone than I really want to know in 20 minutes! Do the initials T.M.I. mean anything to you???

Seriously! I would have a hard time discussing 1/2 of her conversation topics with my best friend of 46 years, but yet she didn't hesitate to discuss them in front of me and two other people that were sunning themselves nearby... one of them a guy!

So the conversation topics included, but were NOT limited to: her gay brother who just found the love of his life, but he has herpes; the infection she got from her breast implants (that one was pretty gross!); her daughter who is 16 is pregnant and is torn between which THREE boyfriends may be the daddy; how she reported her Jeep stolen from a bar she was at two months ago when it was parked on the other side of the parking lot and that subsequently got her a DUI or public intoxication. She's been riding her bike to work the past few months since they impounded her Jeep and she can't afford to bail it out. After a bit, I kinda looked around a bit to see if I could see any hidden cameras that would tip me off to this being an episode of the Jerry Springer show. Nope, no hidden cameras.

I mean, who the heck would sit out in public and discuss these things on a cell phone in front of complete strangers?!

When the timer on the hot tub expired and the jets cut off, I couldn't get out of the hot tub quick enough! I thought about leaving before the time was up, but it was sort of like watching a soap opera... you just had to catch that last tidbit before the commercial break! Hopefully, I won't be subjected to a part two to this episode!